So this is an old post that i forgot to put up.

But I have actually bought a house, with a study, since I wrote this.

And despite having actually bought a bigger place, it's still sadly relevant 😕

Why I have a very complicated relationship with Amazon.co.uk:

I love film, so naturally I want some new blurays.

Oh look, . Maybe the entire Criterion Collection. But then I should also have the BFI collection. With such an impressive collection it seems a shame to be watching them on a 32" telly. I could really use a 60" Smart TV to watch them on.

But my place is far too small for a 60" tv. Not to mention the additional bookcases I'll need to display my impressive film collection. I need to get a bigger house to fit my 60" TV and massive Bluray collection in.

Moving house is a big thing. So if I'm going to have a bigger house I may as well get one with a spare bedroom/study. But I don't 'study' so what else could I do with the spare room that I may as well get? I could have a personal cinema! I do have that awesome collection of movies. The great thing about movies is the cinema experience though. I don't really get that when I watch them on the same screen that I watch QI on.

Which means I'll need a projector with a 110" screen. After all, you can't have a cinema without a cinema screen. Ooh, and you can buy those popcorn makers now, I should definitely get one of those. Who goes to the cinema and doesn't have popcorn right?

I nearly forgot. A proper cinema needs proper sound equipment. I best get some really kickass surround sound set up.

Then it'll be perfect.

Right.

So how much money do I have to kick off this plan for cinematic awesomeness?

Better check my bank balance...

"You have zero funds available"

Ah.

Might as well clear my basket then.

Sometimes I hate what an obsessive consumer I've become.

Love Actually: 20s viewing vs. 30s viewing

I love 'Love Actually'

I get that as a 'serious film fan' I should hate it. It's corny, ridiculous and so emotionally manipulative.

But I love Richard Curtis films for exactly those reasons

That said, over the years I've become more cynical, more jaded and more in love with Emma Thompson than is probably considered healthy.

So here are a few comparisons between Love Actually as I saw it in my 20s, and Love Actually as I see it now...

Keira Knightly/Andrew Lincoln/Chiwetel Ejiofor
20s: Poor Andrew Lincoln. He's so sweet and noble. I hope Keira realises she should be with him rather than her gorgeous husband

30s: Poor Keira Knightley. You finally get your happy ending and the video screws up and the only decent footage is also evidence that your husband's best friend is stalking you. And Andrew Lincoln makes it clear he's in love with you and who needs that kind of confusion.

Alan Rickman/Emma Thompson/Heike Makatsch
20s: Heike is such a bitch! And fuck Alan for being a typical old married cheater. Oh my god, Poor Emma. And my god, Joni Mitchell is fucking amazing.

30s: God I miss Alan Rickman. At least we still have Emma Thompson. I need to rewatch Song of Lunch. And my god, Joni Mitchell is fucking amazing.

Laura Linney/Rodrigo Santoro

20s: OMG!! Poor Laura Linney, she's so awesome, so selfless, so screwed.

30s: meh

Colin Firth/Lucia Moniz
20s: Aww, they fell in love with no words. Sooo Romantic!!

30s: They fell in love despite having never had a conversation. That'll end well!

Liam Neeson
20s: Aww his son has the cutest love story ever.

30s: dude! I get that you're devastated about your loss but your kid is a kid! What are you doing letting him run through airports chasing women at 12 years old??!?

Hugh Grant/Martine McCutcheon
20s: Aww, he stood up to the American President for her! So adorable.

30s: Dude is the Prime Minister and making major political decisions based on his libido. Fuck that guy. Be a man and do your job!

Rowan Atkinson
20s: Dude talk about overselling!

30s: All that effort and no sale! 🙁

Kris Marshall:
20s: urgh, douche. Ooh, Elisha Cuthbert! Well done!

30s: Urgh, douche. January Jones, why?!? I do love The Calling though.

Martin Freeman/Joanna Page
20s: Aww, they fell in love despite extremely awkward beginnings.

30s: Aww, Stacey and John Watson, such a perfect couple!

Bill Nighy
20s: Man, that Bill Nighy is pretty cool.

30s: Bill Nighy is Fucking Awesome!!!

Additional Notes from my 30s:

Forgot that in the early 2000's people singing carols door to door was still a totally normal thing.

Martine McCutcheon saying "where the fuck is my fucking coat" is still my favourite line in the film. No idea why.

I want to see Boris Johnson stuck in a cab with an octopus.

Why is Martine McCutcheon not a massive star at this point?

There's not enough films with Alan Rickman and Emma Thompson together and that will forever make me sad.

Even when he's being super weird Colin Firth will always be Mark Darcy to me.

How exactly is Hugh Grant Emma Thompson's 'big brother'?!

Most bizarre Nativity ever. (And yes, I have seen 'Nativity').

Liam Neeson's son's crush is now famous mostly for animation and am somewhat shocked that she didn't become the next Britney/Beyonce/Mariah because girl's got pipes!

Rowan Atkinson should've been in this more.

Emma Thompson is the most perfect actor in the world. (I knew that in my 20s but it hasn't changed).

Aurelia's family are fucking weird. 

Colin Firth's 'romantic proposal' is seen by all the locals as Aurelia's family 'selling her as a slave to the Englishman'. No one tries to 'save' her. That's really not good.

These days, Thomas Brodie Sangster would never have made it through to the airport terminal.

These days, Bill Nighy still would have performed naked on tv.

Between this and The Holiday there seems to be the belief that a relationship between someone in America and someone in England is totally possible. I only know of one real life example where this actually worked and it involved major relocation! (They are the most adorable couple though).
But in general I have never been able to make a 'North England/South England' long distance relationship work - please leave me your stories of long-distance success in the comments so I can accept that those failures were totally down to me and that there is still hope for others 😉

Forgot Prince William was still single when this came out!

Aurelia has a weird family. But is it really worth marrying some random dude you've never had a conversation with to get out of there?

Joanna Page is just endlessly adorable.

What's Hugh Grant up to now? I miss him.